Why should I put up with this?

I have just come back from a weekend away and after a long but comfortable drive I had had it in mind to write something about cars and such like. Sadly, when I got home I found out that our shed has been broken into for the second time in 3 months. Somehow, I no longer feel like talking about cars.

Several things, apart from the obvious, piss me off about this. For a kick off, there are several other sheds in the gardens around mine, all of them just as accessible as mine and probably with more stuff in them so why was mine targeted? Not that I'd wish it on my neighbours but why mine? To get to it you have to walk down a muddy alley way between the backs of two rows of houses and it's the last (and most exposed) shed of the lot so why pick it?

Next up, there is a window in the shed so you can see that the only things in it are some old tiles, a cheap mower and my old fishing gear so again, why bother breaking in? There is nothing worth stealing.

Thirdly, I live in a nice area. It's not a slum or rough in any way. In fact it's quite cosmopolitan with a range of people from students to pensioners covering professionals, families and so on. Where are these scumbags coming from? It's true that Bath has a lot of skag heads about but this is a pretty low-crime area.

The other things that annoy me about this: My housemates were in all night last night so the prick who did it did so with no regard to being caught. There is no point telling the Police because whilst I'm sure they'll come round and we'll get a crime number, there's not a lot they can really do about it unless we catch the fucker in the act and even then we have to rely on them getting here in time (although they did last time and caught the scrote red-handed so much kudos to my local constabulary for that. Sadly, he probably got a mild ticking off by the magistrate and told not to do it again and I strongly suspect that in fact it was the same contemptuous little turd who came back this time). The only thing this feckless shit actually succeeded in doing was to throw our cheapo mower out onto the lawn, break the door, rip a corner column from a set of cheap wooden shelves in the shed and throw it into the back alley and, it would appear, steal my net bag. This bag contained my landing and keep nets for fishing and frankly, they smell a bit rough, are covered in crap and are worth precisely fuck all so exactly what was the point of this other than mindless vandalism?

Whoever it was did drop their cigarette lighter but I don't think Old Bill are likely to want to fingerprint it. I am sick and tired of the ignorant attitude of these miserable, parasitic arseholes who know full well that they can do as they please and get away with it and it is the law abiding portion of society who, as usual, suffer. If I caught whoever it was at it, I would quite frankly beat them senseless because I have a relatively short fuse for this sort of thing and I would not hesitate to exact my revenge but of course then I'd be the one getting locked up (although I imagine that I could argue that I felt threatened and had used reasonable force to defend myself but it is a system that is totally stacked in favour of the thieving cretin. Perhaps if we were actually allowed to give these turds the hiding they so richly deserve they might think twice about doing it in the first place. Who knows?)

I'm sure there are plenty of liberals, social workers and other feeble minded morons who would say that it wasn't the perp's fault and it was all down to their upbringing. Well that's bullshit. You have to completely retarded to not know that stealing is wrong and illegal and they know full well what they're doing. This liberal mumbo-jumbo horseshit that says we should be nice to criminals has been proven not to work because we have more petty crime than ever before. Thieving pikeys know only too well that the criminal justice system will do no more than give them a bit of a telling off and that even if they do get sentenced to a week in jail, or whatever ludicrous sentence is handed out, it'll be a doddle. They'll have access to TV, porn, pool tables, gyms, the lot, all paid for by John Q Taxpayer, so we get arse fucked twice: Once when they steal, vandalise and otherwise harass us and then a second time when they live the life of Riley at our expense in a holiday camp.

Now, I am just livid and the worst thing is I know that there is not a damn thing I can do about it. Why should I go out and work my arse off, as I have done for years, so that I can enjoy the fruits of my labours only to have some rat boy, who is no doubt doing very nicely out of the benefits system once again at our expense, come and steal and vandalise my stuff and for me to have no recourse whatsoever? Can you tell me how it is that that seems like a fair system? Can anyone explain why it is that I should have to stand by and watch as petty thieves, junkies and junior yobs run riot without any respect for anyone or anything especially the rule of law or a fear of the consequences? No, thought not.

For me, our current government embodies everything I hate and despise about this country with it's slimy, lying, ineffectual policies and the total inability to actually do something positive for the vast majority of law abiding ordinary citizens. I used to vote Tory in the nineties but then once Major was outed I stopped because what was left was an assortment of half-arsed idiots who I wouldn't have trusted to sit on the toilet the right way round. I moved to the Lib Dems but then Paddy Ashdown left and they became a joke party who might as well have their underpants on their heads because they certainly couldn't muster up enough gumption to make a decent fist of running the country, or indeed any policies that made any sense.

So where does that leave me? I suppose, given my rant here about idiotic liberal policies and leftist social workers I should be heading back to the right of centre (quite some way right of centre in terms of the criminal justice system) but I can't bring myself to vote Tory again. David Cameron? Please, the man is nothing more than a chinless, braying ex-public school yahoo with nary a decent idea in his head. The Tories have this notion that if they have younger cabinet members then somehow it makes them more relevant and electable, but the idea of George Osborne and Oliver Letwin having any kind of power scares me silly because they're just as smarmy, moronic and self-interested as Cameron and indeed the Blair government.

No, I think what this country needs is a return to real fire and brimstone politicians who mean what they say, do what they say they're going to do and don't fanny about with these idiotic bureaucratic measures that just cripple our public services and the country in general. While I have never been a fan of the left nor of the unions I would have voted for Labour with John Smith at the helm without hesitation because the man was a direct thinker and had a no-bullshit approach to politics. Politics doesn't need the smarm and the media whoring - it needs integrity and common bloody sense.

It's worth remembering that left wing governments have done some good things in the past (there have also been some which were diabolical and made a mess of the country but that applies to the right as well). The NHS is one example that springs to mind, and once upon a time, they would have been just as tough on criminals as the right wing governments. Why on earth do we have to be driven by bleeding heart liberals now? Screw the Human Rights Act - if you commit a criminal act worthy of serious punishment then you have suspended any entitlement you might have had to anything more than the basic requirements of life because in committing a crime, you have most likely denied the rights of someone else. Get used to it. Not that I'd advocate a return to Victorian conditions but TV's in cells? Sorry but why should I pay to provide that? I would happily pay for effective drug rehabilitation schemes, education and the like but if you won't play ball then you should be shackled into a chain gang and made to break rocks and then locked into your cell whenever you're not breaking rocks. As for anyone caught with drugs in jail or smuggling them in or distributing them, they should be immediately placed in solitary for a long time because they have no right to fuck up someone else's chances of being rehabilitated.

Prison is about two things: Punishment and rehabilitation. Rehabilitation is not achieved by being soft. It is achieved by being strict, instilling discipline, respect and pride. Getting someone off drugs and getting them some education and maybe training so that they can become a useful member of society - that's rehabilitation, but pandering to the whims of recidivist scum is not punishment. Nor are the pitiful sentences handed out these days.

Anyway, I could go on about this for a very long time now that I'm fired up, and indeed I already have but it would be rather pointless - I have have put my point across now and would only be raking over the coals of many other columnists who are better writers than I or who are directly involved with criminal justice such as David Copperfield (who has both those bases covered), so I'll pack it in before I become too bitter or start foaming at the mouth.

Until next time readers (all three of you: Big up to Amanda, Andy and Rob).